We live~ We breathe~ We die~(sometimes we even reincarnate just to start all over again.)

We live. We breathe. We die.

we swallow creativity whole

like gulping down the horizon

the place i see

deep into your eyes

where earth meets sky.

We live. We breathe. We die.

We eat creativity like koi

swim in battled waters

all at once at peace

yet fighting for their food

the soul that feeds them.

When the world was new…

Did the pagan Gods rise from the

Earth and sky to

greet them

the sleek slender Koi

I mean

as they went on swimming by?

We live. We breathe. We die.

and if and when we are lucky

someday we will live long

enough to know the why?


An altar of belief:


An altar by belief,
stands alone in the north west corner,
of my bedroom.
it is the place onto which,
i allow my beliefs to sit.

every once in a while,
i linger there
lighting three candles,
and say my prayers,
with my heart-
not my lips.

my lips do not seem fit.
to express what my heart
longs and shouts out for;
justice, a good life, an omen
or a sign, to allow
me to practice,

the fine art of allowance and
of course self-acceptance.

magical meditations, covered in mystery.
set the stage for most of human

i have an altar of belief which sits,
upon my north-west corner.
Even if my Gods and Goddesses,
are ancient fairy tales to you…

please respect my beliefs,
as I try to respect yours.
if more folks do not try;
to sway and convert the masses,

think of all the less holy wars,
that would be raging
across many a foreign land.

all it takes is a small slit opening,
into your heart,
and some peace and understanding;
for those who see the world much
differently than you do.

blessings-tidings-mote it be,
hence tied by three.

love does not leave

IMAG0906Love does not leave. But sometimes I do. the love itself remains the same. I just have a quirky case of runaway-train-blues. I do not feel like leaving just yet. It wounds him beyond belief whenever I choose to run away. Running away without a compass, a map or even simply a place to stay. His regrets are many what can happen to a mentally ill person-a mentally ill woman-not any woman-but his wife-how can he keep her safe where she runs and flees the people who care the most?

Love does not leave. But sometime I do, the love itself remains the same.

how can i describe ? The feelings of a hurricane jammed into a small 5 x 7 picture frame, frightened to half-death, the weather is messy in here. The moods are wild and frenzied. The person is clearly misunderstood. But how can you understand a lunatic howling at the moon?

How can you understand a tidal wave which is missing its flood?

How can you understand my foreign strange religious views? On New Age, metaphysical, occult and wiccan pagan rituals?

How can an atheist possible relate to the comfort my religion gives to me?

Or how can he understand that each and every spell i have ever done is much akin to prayers?

Should i swallow it all down, tooth and nail, beyond the pale,

that my witchcraft is further proof that i am just another manic-depressive, messy and confounded,

by my own mass confusion-by my own mass solitude?

This is all always used against me,

lit another match and burn me on a stake,

for heavens sake do something quick,

before i wander off aimlessly again…

nowhere to go, no compass, no map, no plan of attack.

love does not leave,

but sometimes i do.


New Age-funk

I am trapped into,

a New Age Funk…

ever since I was only 15 years old.

I have the strangest sect of beliefs,

my thoughts on Religion is very polytheist-rather than atypical,

monotheism -despite being raised, “a good christian girl.”

Something inside me; melted and changed,

into beliefs of the ways of the old, the Ancients.

Superstitious views of three-folded ways,

Mysticism, Pagan, Wiccan, Zen-I get lost in theologies.

I married an Atheist.

Certain things seem so real to me,

yet others find them

so damn far out.

Karma, Reincarnation, Ghosts, Astral Projection,

Crystal Gazing, Candle Magick, Tarot Cards,

E.S.P. Strange dreams,de ja vu, other things which i care

not to even try to explain.

Sometimes, I just know stuff,

and some of its quite bizarre…

yet my intuition is composed entirely,

of mere hunches,

of things I somehow know or knew or thought i knew.

I’m trapped inside a New-Age Funk.

It’s not bad in here, just kinda surreal.

I’m almost 40 years old,

so at this point these beliefs are not going to alter,

or shift much.

Part of it is very comforting and reassuring.

But the other part, feels like I’m not living up to my

end of the bargin. There are gifts or talents I may or

may not even have, yet I refused to use them.

I let them sit on a dusty shelf,

right behind my outter-skin-layer

of “crazy”.Spirituality, acrylic and sand on canvasboard 1996


Sometimes my past,

catches up with me and

it seduces me, with torrid tales, lies, and


confusion of;

distortion of faulty fact.

Sometimes, I walk heavy

with a 30 lbs baby dinosaur on my back.

Ancient times call for Ancient measures.

A ring of salt, forms a circle cast.

A temple prayer, a Buddhist chant, and the ringing

of a bell goes blink, blink,blink…into my mind’s eye.

There are places I’ve seen,

There are places I’ve been,

Encased, enclosed and Trapped -into a dream.

Sometimes, I ponder the what, why, when,how,where of things…

my memories are hazy,

my feet tremble slightly,

as I collapse, crumble and walk out

of your dream.

Religion makes me very uneasy…

Religion makes me very uneasy.

The one i believe in, versus the one you preach from.

Pulpit, and preacher, your Bible tells you what to do.

How nice and refreshing, that must be for you-even comforting.

I am glad you have found “your-way.” (cough,cough,cough)

Please do not force your opinion of God, down my throat,

my throats been kinda dry, i may just throw up or choke.

Pulpit, and preacher, your Bible tells you what to do.

How very nice for you…. but do not go out, trying to “Save my Soul.”

I was both baptized and confirmed very very very, long ago.

Under your golden rule-book that means “I’m saved.”

But do not make assumptions, about things, you do not understand.

My Religion is older than yours is. I worship a pantheon of Gods and Goddesses, how dare you to assume, that I am something, some call “Satanic”.

I do not even believe in Satan, or the Bible or God, as you misrepresent him.

If i mention one small iota about my religion, my Goddess, or Tarot Decks or an New Age belief, If I damn please

-then you are horribly offended.

That is the role in life you choose for you-not me-now,

do i get all hysterical and go off

on you because you mention you are “praying” for a friend.

Or making endless face-book quotes- on how much you love Jesus?

Do I ever try to tell you, that loving Jesus is a Sin??? No. No. No. Not at all.

I respect your beliefs, so please can you just,

re-consider accepting mine are different, from yours, and leave it at that.

The Great European Witch-hunts were over, many ages ago.


How about we do not bring them back?

Why am i so defensive?

Well, because you’ve got me under attack.

please keep your rosary to yourself, the same goes for your evangelical preaching.

If you wanna go throw a bible in my face, I’m going to simply say

, Jesus taught you to, “love thy neighbor as thyself.”

Religion makes me very uneasy;

in fact i feel a little queasy.

A prayer for the Earth

earth day drawing 1

A prayer for the Earth by Emily Sturgill 4/23/13

Mother Goddess Gaia,

Oh Great One in the Sky,

Once worshiped as Divine.

Isis, Ra, Nut, Osiris;

Demeter, Hades, Persephone….

Gods and Goddess of old both down and above,

Hear our prayers for our little planet,

and bring forth some love.

Bring us the midnight sky, and her highness the Moon,

shining brightly Round and Full, in her own sheer gorgeous brillance.

Bring us the rainbows at the ends of the storm-clouds,

Light up our souls with sunrise and sunsets,

and the time, spent in-between.

Show us your power and glory-

led us by the example of

Earth’s joyous beauty,

so we treat our planet better and thank her more.

So we give God the Sun, a reason to keep on spinning and shining brightly-

not only for us-but our children too-or the children of others if we bear

no fruit of our own. Dearest Hecate, Gaia, Kali,-Mother Earth,

please forgive our past transgressions,

as we trample our lovely planet,

and take for granted the simple beauty beneath our feet.

The ground, the dirt we walk on is a hallowed


The Earth itself a holy place.

Let’s not forget,

the Earth does not belong to us Alone,

We belong to the Earth itself.

Remember her beauty, <Mother Nature> Goddess Earth,

not just on Earth Day but everyday. Seek out her beauty within all of us, and around us everywhere.

Observe the singularly beauty in her teardrops as the Rain falls,

nurturing our forests and crops.

Observe the Earth’s light within your own,

might and power. It is all around, it is everywhere and everything, it is inside all of us.

It is our Earth and we should respect her.

Earth day drawing1Happy Earth Day everybody.