the losing battle
before winning the war,
the War rages on, forever and a day-
have i always felt this way?
the losing battle,
my mind cracks into half,
like an egg-shell,
the whites of my eyes pour out,
into a flood of never weeping tears.
the losing battle,
will i win the war?
I am so sick &tired of us-
fighting all the time-
we only fight when i get “sick”-
whenever I am not myself, and having
another “episode”
these pretty words beneath the encased glass
of quotation marks-keeping them shiny and brand new-
as the day i wish i never first heard them,
in the first goddamn place.
They are just pretty flourish, whipped cream on top,
decorative descriptions to explain,
i am clearly going crazy again.
the losing battle,
always the same, so sick & tired of losing
this fight.
it’s hard to explain,
but when you say i am crazy,
that’s about the same-time
as when i feel most alive.
When i feel the tiniest speck of happiness,
wetting down the back of my neck.
the losing battle,
as the war wages onwards-
i only take the damned pills to-
shut everyone up!
no i do not hear voices-
these are real life persons. who nag beyond
comprehension.
I am losing both the battle and the war.
Thats the only thing,
which stands out,
crystal clear.
sexinthekitchensink 