Endometriosis please stop! Your killing me….

Here is a link that describes this invisible, random and rare illness I have. I have stage 4 the most severe.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/abby-norman/this-is-what-endometriosi_b_5704273.html

Words cannot express:

Words cannot express

Words can tear me down

or

Words can lift me up

but words can never express-all this pain i feel.

this pain is REAL.

this pain is kinda, sorta, A BIG DEAL.

Words cannot express

the intensity

the depths

of my

chronic pain.

and i feel

as though i am losing

my mind.

I found a doctor

who will prescribe

a new pain medication.

but we cannot get it filled

until after May 19th

my next menes is due on May 17th

it’s going to suck

but somehow

i will make do

somehow i

will pull through.

in the meantime-

all i ask,

is

please

Endometriosis,

please stop

this pain

is

killing

me,

Pain of plenty

The pain of plenty-

Awoken at 3:30 Am

pain washes over me

i ride it like waves

as a surfer surfs the shore

i ride it until

it don’t hurt no more.

The pain of plenty-

living with a chronic

pain condition

is frightening.

Until it becomes obvious-

most other persons

remain oblivious….

as i try

to just suck it up

like a little

piece of doom and misery-

drunk up with a straw.

And it’s the last,

straw i mean

the one that broke the camels…NO WAIT-

the straw that broke MY OWN back.

and sometimes i do not

handle it very well.

sometimes i do not

handle it well

at all.

instead I just smile

like a cheshire cat

and smoke my nicotine

in cigarettes, instead of a pipe.

I just smile and picture

the innocent people without

my disease, as if

I could whisper it into their ear

and then they could

twist, convulse contort and cry

for a while.

Just imagine all the haters

and the ones who do not believe-

just imagine them twisting into the wind

like a kite and sailing down

into my bloody landscape

my real estate

that’s constantly

up for sale-

somewhere in Hell.