Treading Water

Treading Water 10/28/19

Some tread with Angels.
Some tread with Gods.
Some tread with Goddesses.
Some tread with Artists.
Some walk with
Muses.
Some walk with Writers.

I tread lightly.
I am treading water again.
Sinking and rising,
I tread lightly.

I walk with Poets.
I sing the unsung song.
As the Earth meets
my feet
I tread where I belong.

Swimming with sharks

Swimming with Sharks 6/15/19

Summer brings warmer waters.

Summer welcomes beautiful oceans,

and breathless seas.

Sandy white beaches, scattered sea shells and

thrilling deep diving.

Summer brings tranquility, solace and happiness.

Be wary of that deep dive and all those thrills however…

Summer’s warm waters also brings

sharks closer to the shores.

Before you know it if your not careful

you’ll be swimming with sharks

turning the beauty of the ocean

into a scarlet tide

not only dark red deep

but terrifying

what once was so beautiful

can turn on you

you’ll be lucky if you make it out alive.

you’ll be lucky if you survive.

and that’s how I feel

as I struggle with my manic-depression.

It contains all the beauty of the entire ocean

but the sharks swim there too.

Wintertime Blues

2-6-19

Winter brings icy frosted

daydreams of Spring

as I hunger for warmth

I am surrounded by dense frozen cold.

Winter brings harsh cold and blue colored sadness.

I’m living in a Detroit suburb but my heart’s in Florida.

where my older sister and my father live….

not my entire heart though simply pieces of it.

The rest of my heart lives here in Michigan with my husband

and our family….but these cold temps, harsh cold and blue colored sadness….

it brings a sort of fleeting depressed madness.

as I  hunger for warmth

I am surrounded by dense frozen cold.

Winter brings icy frosted

daydreams of Spring.

 

January Kindle Deals and Freebies!

In Jan 2019 I have two of my kindle ebooks on Kindle Countdown Sales. The first is my collection of artworks called “Art before Words.” The normal kindle price is $9.99 but starting tomorrow Jan 11,2019 at 8:00AM PST it will just be 99 cents. Between Jan 12-16th the price will increase by $1.00 per day until it hits $4.99.It will stay $4.99 until Jan 18th 12:00 AM PST. My second kindle e-book on sale is a book I was fortunate enough to edit. It’s a wonderful anthology of poetry by various poets I met through my blog. It’s called “Dredging up Demeter: An Autumn Anthology of poetry.” Edited by Emily H. Sturgill. It’s normally priced at $3.33 but under this sale from Jan 11,2019 at 8:00AM PST it will be available for only 99 cents. On Jan 14th the price will increase to $1.99 and will stay that price until Jan 18th 2019.

Freebies in Jan 2019.

I have six ebooks that I am offering free promotions for. The first one is called,”A mandala that happened on the way to a car crash & other stories.” This will be free starting today Jan 10,2019 at 10:00AM PST until Monday Jan 14th at 11:59 PM PST. This is a really exciting book for me to write. Primarily I do write mostly poetry but this book is my first attempt at short stories and fiction. I would love any feedback my readers can give me if they choose to download this book and read it. You can leave feedback on my Author’s page at http://www.amazon.com/Emily-Sturgill/e/B00B1GC5LY.

The second freebie is my very first ebook, “Sex in the kitchen sink: poetry and art.”by Emily H. Sturgill. It will be free starting tomorrow Jan 11th 2019 12:00AM-Jan 15th 2019 11:59PM PST. The third free book is a collection of poetry called “Red Bones.”by Emily H. Sturgill. It will be free starting Monday Jan 21, 2019 12:00AM PST-Jan 25, 2019 11:59 PM.

The fourth e-book that will be available for free downloads is very special to me. It is my very first Anthology of Poetry. It was started as a project on this blog asking for poets to submit their work. Normally it only costs 99 cents but you can get it free from Jan 21st 2019 at 12:00AM PST-Jan 25th at 11:59 PM. All of my books are available by visiting Amazon.com at this link: http://www.amazon.com/Emily-Sturgill/e/B00B1GC5LY. This wonderful Anthology is called,”Help Wanted: poets please apply.” Edited by Emily H. Sturgill.

The last two freebies are older ebooks on the kindle by me. They are both poetry collections. But they both deal with aspects of my bipolar disorder. My fifth free ebook is called “On the brink letters to the madness+poems & pictures,” and my sixth free ebook is it’s sequel “On the brink letters to the madness+poems & pictures Vol 2.” both are free starting Jan 28th 2019 at 12:00AM PST-Jan 30th 2019 at 11:59PM PST.

All of my poetry and artist chapbooks can be found at Amazon.com.

Please follow this link if your interested: http://www.amazon.com/Emily-Sturgill/e/B00B1GC5LY.

Not enough

Not enough-

Dec 26th, 2014

Friday Afternoon 2:49 EST

Not enough

Never enough

Not enough

sleep.

Not enough,

to eat.

Not enough,

to touch the sky & kidnap the Sun.

Not enough, to learn how to fly,

just enough to become

untied

undone.

Not enough to reach outwards and find it.

Not enough to reach out, and grab the happy

right off someone else’s face,

because my happy

its become erased

misplaced

lost confusion.

It’s just not enough,

to fix up this place.

It’s not enough to straighten

this room, to clean between the cracks, to sweep

a broom across this dusty room

deep inside my minds eye.

Not enough,

to touch the sky & kidnap the Sun.

Not enough, to learn how to fly,

just enough to become

untied

undone.

It’s not enough to

try to run, to sprint, to finish

the race.

I’m fresh out of lungs

the air is too sharp, cold and dry-

It’s not enough,

to just sit here

waiting for you

to get home.

It’s not enough, to be a failure as a housewife,

to be a successful lunatic

with a Masters Degree

and no job prospects.

It’s not enough

to be a crazy person,

living on SSDI, it’s not enough, to always

live in someone else’s shadow

it’s not enough

to be the ghost

you can come home

and answer too.

Don’t you understand?

My wings may have melted, because I flew

too closely to the Sun

but I have dreams too.

I do not long to be

someone else’s

no one.

Book on Bipolar disorder, “A Brief Guide to Thriving for individual with mental illness and their loved ones.”

I reviewed this book on Good Reads last winter, I believe? But in case anyone missed it. It is worth mentioning here again on my blog. This book “A Brief Guide to Thriving for individual with mental illness and their loved ones.” is by Leesa Abbott, Psy.D I am also mentioning this work in particular because the Author has decided to release a personal memoir soon of her own personal struggles and triumphs living with a SMI-(Serious Mental illness) I am beyond excited about her new release and will let my readers know as soon as I know when that title does become available. Dr. Abbott is a University Professor, a professional poet & author, a mental health advocate who also does volunteer work for NAMI in her spare time. On top of all those things, she also leads a support group for teens struggling with depression while caring for her friends and family. Here is my Review:

“In this book, Dr. Abbott addresses several basic issues and concerns, which would be very useful to anyone diagnosed recently with mental illness, or that person’s friends and family.She presents a model of Recovery in five stages. Dr. Abbott writes that she adopted-(invented perhaps?)-this model, after studying similar models such as the well known 5 stages of Grief/ Loss or certain recovery from addiction models.However she contrasts her model by pointing out while other models are static, hers is not. She feels her model is more fluid-to me her model almost seems circular-although we both agree that a person in any process form of recovery from mental illness may repeat these stages or regress or progress at different stages.

As she points out many with mental illnesses may go in and out of these stages at any given time. Here are her five stages: 1. Psychological Changes 2. Self-Awareness of those changes 3.Receiving help.4. Acceptance of ones own mental illness. 5.Reaching out to others. She does explain not everyone will complete this entire process outlined. The last step is the hardest-to deal with stigma and to reach out to others in need-still suffering-while this is noble-not everyone is capable of this or even wishes to try this.(the author does acknowledge this fact.) Also in this book she recounts her own story of mental illness. I do wish that this section was longer and that she would have expanded. But this is a brief guidebook, I do understand why her focus is not on her personal experiences so much. She centers on the issues faced by those with mental illness and how to help.

This is an useful resource no matter what stage of recovery you are in. This book is ideal because it emphasizes two things; You are not alone and there are a multitude of ways you can help yourself.
One last thing I would like to add, is what the Author says about Hope: “The self-fulfilling
prophecy studied by psychologists, includes the idea that what we continue to believe about ourselves or our future will Eventually come to be. It’s essential to maintain a positive outlook about yourself and your future.”(2013, Abbott.L, p.26)”

 

Video and interview with the author, Dr.Leesa Abbott

“Memoirs Recalled Madness: a personal account of manic-depression.”by Emily Sturgill just $3.99

“Memoirs Recalled Madness: a personal account of manic-depression.”by Emily Sturgill  is currently a kindle-countdown deal.

Right now its priced is reduced from $9.99 to just $3.99. As a countdeal deal the price will slowly increase over the next few days. So I encourage you to buy a copy asap while its still such a low price! It’s a personal memoir dealing with growing up then being diagnosed with bipolar disorder right after high school and my life ever since. The highs and lows but also the successes of a life living with a serious mental health issue.

For more info please follow this link here:

http://www.amazon.com/Memoirs-Recalled-Madness-personal-depressive-ebook/dp/B00C145EOU/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1415134043&sr=1-1

The price is set to increase by $1 tomorrow.