Searching among a sea of Secrets.
Looking for answers buried deep
inside my core
So much slips by
my subconscious eye.
Somedays I do not know
where I begin and where my illness,
Stability is the ultimate goal.
To mend what is broken
To become whole.
Yet the parts I try
to deny linger and remain
a constant refrain in the chorus
which settles for
background music of a sort,
the melody of manic-depression.
So much regression, so much tug & back
then forth-some days I have clarity
and others I wish I did not.
The stuff I block out
The mysteries of that which makes me-
Knowingly, I must struggle
to accept all the parts of my self
even the sick bits and pieces-
until I am able to embrace it all
to stake a claim-
a subdivision between this mood
or the next.
Trying my best, not only
to recover but to re-discover
the parts I try best to never see.
The big, the bad, the ugly
even the beautiful