Tears fill my eyes leaking out at the corners…

Tears fill my eyes, leaking out at the corners…

is the love i thought i knew,

the love i thought i had with you.

 

Did you ever really love me?

Are you even capable of that?

now, that i have escaped both your grasp,

and your liars heart…

i can listen to my inner voice inside

my head, warning me that you

 

are a very dangerous man indeed.

warning me to not fall for the pity-trap.

to close my ears while you say,please.please.please.

Listen, i will change.

 

and I guess in all this time;

to your credit, you did change

except its for the worst.

 

How did i fall for this?

Was i really so desperate,

for anybody to love me-that

i settled for you???

 

Somebody who loves to love,

and somebody who hates that which

he loves, as a vicious abusive-controlling

mind game.

 

it hurts me deeply-

to realize now after 13 years,

i never knew the real you.

 

it was all stage lightening and fake drama.

you were always an actor,

playing a part,

yet also a wolf lunging for my heart.

 

You could paint a nice story

with words alone. My family adored you.

But they were without all the facts.

 

And i was too scared to tell them on you.

the emotional, mental abuse was more often

then the physical stuff.

 

Despite my Daddy telling me, “Do not ever let a man put his arms on you in anger.”

“Don’t ever let a man hit you.”

Despite these facts-i choose only to see your halo.

The one i gave to you.

 

If only i would have stared harder-

i would have seen it as broken, rusty

an obtusity.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s